Another game for our amusement...
We'll call this one 'The Greatest Book EVER!'
Simply read what's gone before, and add a paragraph to the story.
If you think that somebody's addition was rubbish, type 'VETO <name>' - if 3 vetos pop up I'll delete back to the previous post.
Matlu blinked his eyes open to the sound of Suzi Quattro crooning out from his radio. A brief look of glazed resignation flashed across his face as he realised he was going to have to get up. Unfurling the duvet his legs swung with a thud onto the wooden floor, and plodded themselves pendulously across his room to his wardrobe. Vest, T-shirt, trousers, a quick glance of egotistical admiration in his mirror, and he trooped towards his front door to face the day. Just as he was about to turn the handle he jumped back shock as the door bell rang - 'spooky', he thought. A quick twist and pull, and there standing in front of him was...
...Julius Caesar! Complete in a white toga and a red cape, the Emperor of Rome advanced towards matlu, his face expressionless. Matlu looked shocked, and took a step back. Caesar stopped as a slight smile grew on his handsome face and spoke 'Hello. I am collecting for the society of The Research of Ancient Rome. Would you care to make a contribution?' A look of disgust formed on matlu's face as he slapped the collector and slammed the door in his face. Matlu sighed audibly and turned around, and to his disbelief, there was a...
hoard of ferrets. standing in his room. one of the ferrets steped forword. he stated, "I am quenzok, leader of the feronites. we came from the moon, and our civilization is much more advanced then yours. we traveled here at 3 times the speed of light because we heard you slamed our offer of peace in our face. we revived your "julius ceasar" for you and what do you do? deny him. well this means war." as he turned to his troops, "lets head back our home planet, the moon, and gather the troops." as they left, matlu knew there was only one thing he could do...
...he had to prance around like a pony because he knew a ferret's biggest fear was a prancing pony. As he began to put on his pracing shoes, he tripped and saw an ant on the ground. In a very squeaky voice the ant said "I am t3h 0wnz3r0r! Ph33r m3!" Matlu jumped back onto feet in astonishment, crushed the ant, and then began to prance. Then all of a sudden, his...
feet exploded! he walked over to the hospital on his hands as fast as he could. once he got there, they told him there was nothing they could do. but then he flashed em a 10, and they got strait to work! they replaced his feet with...
Pie. Blueberry pie. As he walked around, you could hear the squish squish. Luckily, matlu has the ability to lick his toes, and lets just say he was licking them a lot more often now. Suddenly, as he was licking his toes, a dinosaur came out of no where and said "Wheres my momma?" and matlu replied "Right behind you". So the dinosaur looked behind him and his mom was there. "Thanks a lot pal" said the dinosaur. "No problem, its what I do" replied matlu. Feeling accomplished, matlu began to lick his toes again when suddenly quenzok, the leader of all ferrets, appeared out of no where and ask him...
Before gut even posts, I'm going to <veto Sir Gut>
"have you accepted our peace offer yet? this is your last chance." knowing he hadnt contacted ceasar, he decided to lie, in an attempt to save earth. "yes, i donated $1000." but quenzok knew he was lieing, seeing as he could read minds, but since matlu didnt know about this power, quenzok decided to be sneaky...
and btw, veto <Sir Gut>
quenzok than asked matlu to go on a quest. In this quest he had to find the netherland ranch. Which there he had to save quenzoks son who was 7 years old. On the quest matlu found a knight with a magic sword. and the knight with the magic sword said "if you beat me in a battle you get the magic sword for all eternity". Than after matlu kills the knight, he prances over to the netherland ranch and as Matlu walks in the door he hears a scream. As he listened in shock....
he hears the kidnapper screaming at onitikmo (queznoks son), because the knight that was suppost to bring him the sword of ageing that ages anything it hits 1000 years. matlu, hearing this decides to do something drastic! he...
comitted suicide
...was about to use a cheat *GASP* when the computer suddenly switched off. Matlu, realising he is back in reality, was disgusted at the power cut. Matlu made himself some breakfast, and suddenly the doorbell rang. Matlu trundled towards the door, opened it, and there was Julius Caesar! Complete in a white toga and a red cape, the Emperor of Rome advanced towards matlu, his face expressionless. Matlu looked shocked, and took a step back. Caesar stopped as a slight smile grew on his handsome face and spoke 'Hello. I am collecting for the society of The Research of Ancient Rome. Would you care to make a contribution?' A look of disgust formed on matlu's face as he slapped the collector and slammed the door in his face. Matlu sighed audibly and turned around, and to his disbelief, there was a...
...buggy, just as in Cyber Battles, puffing out exhaust all over his apartment. He grabbed the nearest light sabre, knowing it would bring up his attack points and increase his percentage of winning. He attacked the buggy with all of his might, and in awe at it not dieing he said: "WTF!?! Hax!! 2 defense, and 7 attack!!?!" As he ran to his computer to post about a Hax0r, the buggy suddenly...
...exploded, showering the apartment with debris. Matlu's force shield saved him from the flying metal car parts. Matlu got in his car, and drove to work, whistling the theme song to the Simpsons. As he turned the corner into the car park, matlu's jaw dropped as he saw a...
...inconveniently placed mutant mount, making Matlu engage in combat, blocking him from his parking spot. This unconventional sight didn't delay Matlu for long, as thinking quickly he called upon his ship to beam a...
probe. The probe had no effect on the situation, and the mount quickly destroyed the probe. Matlu let out an angry moan and had to dispatch of this fiend or else he would be late for work. There was only one way matlu could win. Matlu decided to...
Quote from: SiR gUt on March 04, 2006, 08:04:47 PM
an ugly looking bakster standing there, huffing and puffing, whining and crying his eyes out. Matlu says why are you crying bakster?? bakster says, "because i suck at cyber battles and can never win, matlu can you help me stop sucking??". Matlu says sure bakster, lets go the land of gutotimus. There we will find SiR gUt and he will give you the power to win. As matlu and crybaby bakster walked down the red brick road all you can hear were the sounds of bakster going... WWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH :'( and than all of a sudden bakster get struck by lightning and....
Quoteprobe. The probe had no effect on the situation, and the mount quickly destroyed the probe. Matlu let out an angry moan and had to dispatch of this fiend or else he would be late for work. There was only one way matlu could win. Matlu decided to...
...Eat some beef jerky. Not because it would improve the situation, just because it made him feel more manly. Matlu then turned around, stood with his hands on his hips and laughed like a pirate until the mutant mount got embarrassed and sulked away. Matlu then dusted his hands off and stepped inside his office, noticing with pleasure that the doors opened automatically for him because he was so great.
But around the corner was something so terrifying that our hero gave a slight shudder, it was...
... a small girl with braided pig tails and a pink 'Princess' dress. Matlu had always had a phobia of small girls with braided pig tails and pink 'Princess' dress's since the 'Playground' incident in third grade. "I've lost my mommy, can you help me?" shrilled the fiend in pink, it's every word searing Matlu's nerves like nails down a blackboard. But Matlu was a private investigator (apparently), and he never turned down a job. Well, he occasionally did, but he decided not to this time, otherwise the story would be fairly short. Through his gritted teeth he nodded to the tearful tyke at his feet. "My name's Anima," she said, extending her hand skywards in hope of a comforting grasp. Giving Anima the briefest of limp hand shakes, he grunted, "Matlu, let's go" in reply, before opening the door and traipsing on to a new, and rather exciting, adventure...
a vulture swooped down and grasped anima and flew away with her matlu jumped in his gt mustang and raced after it firing his ak 47 mounted on the windshield (convertable so the roofs down) he was falling behind so he hit the booster button and thought to himself...
..."custard cream cake with cherried caramel chocolate". Matlu licked his lips at this delicious thought, and stopped at the store. Matlu ordered a custard cream cake with cherried caramel chocolate. The shopkeeper couldn't hide his sniggering, and matlu didn't hesitate to shoot him mercilessly with the AK-47. Matlu turned to exit the store, and was shocked to see Homer Simpson! The King of 2D animation handed him a 2D custard cream cake with cherried caramel chocolate before vanishing. Matlu bit into his custard cream cake with cherried caramel chocolate and discovered it was...
....it was a huge piece of poop named mr hankey (from south park) matlu vomited for 2 days and mr hankey said ill grant you 2 wishes like a genie and matlu though hmmmm ill have to becareful cause if im not specific my wish will get screwd up
... and then Matlu wanted to have s3x0r! So he r4p3d the pr33ty girl 4n1ma. Anima enjoyed in throughly.
but then he wondered... if a drummer accidentily picked up 2 magic wands insted of drum sticks, he would turn the bass player into a meatball or something